I started writing about comfort a while back, but had to stop; because there were things to do, and people who "needed me" and important stuff like work, and money to be minted. I wasn't really comfortable, but I think that at that point, I wanted to explore the concept of what it means to be comfortable, with self and others. Because I had recently had, unsurprisingly, a revelation!
Now, there's been rain outside and it's a Sunday, and the only pressing things in life are the cooking baking in the oven and the 8pm appointment for a hair cut, for my sister. I feel comfortable, at ease with myself. Which has increasingly become a very rare occurrence, in the past few months. Sometime I seek these moments SO MUCH that it in itself becomes a damned discomfort, like trying to "find yourself" or "discover you"(epic fails on both counts) :)
However, as I am comfortable now, I'd like to say for the record that to find even a few people with whom one can be completely at ease, is a real gift. Family, yes, always, thank God. Good friends, if you're lucky. Room-mates, I have found, by sheer necessity...and sometimes they even like you for it! Ha. Yourself, whoopie if you find it, I'm still on that quest.
But others, other. One more person. Who you don't feel like pretending with, trying too hard for, being mature for, that now that, comes only if you're rather blessed, I think.
Now, there's been rain outside and it's a Sunday, and the only pressing things in life are the cooking baking in the oven and the 8pm appointment for a hair cut, for my sister. I feel comfortable, at ease with myself. Which has increasingly become a very rare occurrence, in the past few months. Sometime I seek these moments SO MUCH that it in itself becomes a damned discomfort, like trying to "find yourself" or "discover you"(epic fails on both counts) :)However, as I am comfortable now, I'd like to say for the record that to find even a few people with whom one can be completely at ease, is a real gift. Family, yes, always, thank God. Good friends, if you're lucky. Room-mates, I have found, by sheer necessity...and sometimes they even like you for it! Ha. Yourself, whoopie if you find it, I'm still on that quest.
But others, other. One more person. Who you don't feel like pretending with, trying too hard for, being mature for, that now that, comes only if you're rather blessed, I think.
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